Don't Lick the Wall
I've mentioned this before, but Zoey is the ultimate troublemaker. And surprisingly enough, she understands when she's done something wrong, and looks all guilty. Every day she reassures me that dogs can, in fact, be mischievous, doing something they know is wrong just for the heck of it. Let me paint you a picture of how I've come to this conclusion. The walls at my old apartment in Seattle were an off-white color. One day I noticed that close to the ground, there was a gray streak going across the hallway wall. Now, it was low enough that it wouldn't have been something I rubbed against the wall when bringing in, but high up enough that it wouldn't be my shoes. It took me weeks to find out that Zoey was the culprit. One day when I checked on her through my pupcam, she looked like someone had put her in time out. She was sitting in the middle of the hallway, facing the wall. Then, when I zoomed in, I realized that she was licking the wall. At first, I thought I was crazy, and my camera must be melting from sitting by the window. Then I transitioned to thinking she was crazy. What kind of dog, alone at home, sits facing the wall, licking it?? When I got home, I went and checked, and sure enough, it was at the perfect height for where she would reach to lick something while sitting down.
Now, Zoey licking something isn't news to anyone. The creature has some serious OCD when it comes to licking just about anything. But, unlike my cabinets, shoes, cardboard boxes, or carpet, cleaning the stain off the wall proved next to impossible, and it's not like I can just pick it up and throw it away. So every time I noticed her licking any wall, I would scold her for it. And she would stop and find something new to do.
A few weeks later, she had a lightbulb moment. I was sitting on my couch having dinner and I look over and she's whining, wanting to go outside. This was 20 minutes after we'd done a 3 mile walk, so there was no way I was taking her back outside so soon. So I called her over, away from the hallway. Not only did she ignore me, but the next few seconds went like this:
Natalia: Zoey, come over here.
Zoey: * sits still staring at the wall, ignoring mom *
Natalia: Zoey, get over here.
Zoey: * looks at mom and sticks her tongue out towards the wall *
Natalia: Zoey, do not lick the wall. Come here.
Zoey: * leans toward the wall with tongue stuck out *
Natalia: Damn it Zoey, don't lick the wall. Come here.
Zoey: * takes the biggest lick of the wall ever and runs away to hide under the bed *
Natalia: %&$#?@!
Zoey: * hides under the bed for an hour then comes out sheepishly with ears down and tail between the legs to kiss and make up *
This scenario went on every time I scolded her for something. She would run to the hallway, lick the wall as she ran by, and then hide under the bed for the next hour. And then we moved to a new house.
